porn, super porn
the unbearable lightness of being underage
2004-04-09 | 2:52 p.m.

I made a friend named Coco today. Actually, she made me a medium latte while I fantasized about how cool it would be to have a friend named 'Coco,' so when someone asks me 'what are you up tonight?' I can say 'yeah... Coco and I are going to do this and this and this.' While thoroughly submerged in fantasies of running through fuzzy, pastel fields hand-in-hand with Coco, she said 'So... you go to high school?' No. I am an adult who owns a handgun. The thing is, this happens all of the time, especially when I run into Sam's school to give her some homework, or lunch, or if I just want to embarrass her in front of her friends. Teachers sternly look at me and want to know where in the hell my hall-pass is. I've gotten in trouble at high school now more than I ever did when I was actually going there. The only time I ever was really in trouble when I was young and tender was when I moved a piano without permission into the main hall and started playing the old school mario brothers theme song and once I threw a CS Lewis book as hard as I could. High school was an indelibly precious time but if I ever get nostalgic I suppose it's entirely plausible to just walk around Sam's school until someone yells at me. Youth truly is wasted on the young, and people that look young.

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